Sonntag, November 12, 2006
Lifelines
Many thoughts for one evening.
Ich bin ausgekühlt.
No man is an island.
Ich hänge an keiner Heimat.
I am a nomad.
Doch bin ich abhängig.
I hang (myself) on (to) my lifelines (far too often).
I walk through the world with a crayon dragging behind me, leaving my mark. Different places, different people, and I use different colours. My lifeline is continuous.
That does not keep it from looping. Last week it looped back onto itself, maybe. When I treaded the beach this evening, Orion was just where it was a week ago.
I decided to elevate my lifeline - give it a new shape, a different pattern, or a different breadth. Clean slate, different chapter, same line.
When my line seemed to lose itself, I went inside (myself) to trace it. I went outside to follow it. I wanted to see it draw behind me.
The walk took me onto the pier - a dead end. Fortunately there is somebody who can tell me that there is always a second way out of a blocked path - and I continued drawing my line, never twice in the same place. Patterns flickering with every word I spoke, every phrase I heard.
When I had returned, Orion had moved. Yet here I was, my line on the dark pavement behind me, a small loop. I had done it again - but it had moved me, in time by an hour, in space by very little, emotionally the distance - when really I had only walked back and forth, tracing my past line while drawing the future one.
Tomorrow I will draw my line with new enthusiasm. This is my line. I walk the line, I draw the line, I move on. This has long become part of my line - but it may need a dead end and wise words for me to see.
Current Music: Jeff Buckley - Hallelujah
Ich bin ausgekühlt.
No man is an island.
Ich hänge an keiner Heimat.
I am a nomad.
Doch bin ich abhängig.
I hang (myself) on (to) my lifelines (far too often).
I walk through the world with a crayon dragging behind me, leaving my mark. Different places, different people, and I use different colours. My lifeline is continuous.
That does not keep it from looping. Last week it looped back onto itself, maybe. When I treaded the beach this evening, Orion was just where it was a week ago.
I decided to elevate my lifeline - give it a new shape, a different pattern, or a different breadth. Clean slate, different chapter, same line.
When my line seemed to lose itself, I went inside (myself) to trace it. I went outside to follow it. I wanted to see it draw behind me.
The walk took me onto the pier - a dead end. Fortunately there is somebody who can tell me that there is always a second way out of a blocked path - and I continued drawing my line, never twice in the same place. Patterns flickering with every word I spoke, every phrase I heard.
When I had returned, Orion had moved. Yet here I was, my line on the dark pavement behind me, a small loop. I had done it again - but it had moved me, in time by an hour, in space by very little, emotionally the distance - when really I had only walked back and forth, tracing my past line while drawing the future one.
Tomorrow I will draw my line with new enthusiasm. This is my line. I walk the line, I draw the line, I move on. This has long become part of my line - but it may need a dead end and wise words for me to see.
Current Music: Jeff Buckley - Hallelujah